Coworker “A” comes in this morning and asked us “Did you get
any special surprises for Valentine’s Day?” Coworker “B” responds that she got
a dozen roses from her husband and I reply that we don’t observe Valentine’s
Day. So Coworker “A” (who has a daughter just a few years younger than me)
starts telling us about her surprise….“I was having a bad day yesterday, so
when I got home I just went and laid on the couch. I heard my husband come in a
while later and go straight up stairs. When he didn’t come down, I went to see what
he was doing.” In a very excited voice she continued “he got me one of those 4 1/2 ft teddy bears and had it sitting on our
bed!!!! It is so ADORABLE”. Now at this point I am trying really hard to be
supportive, but those things are creepy and why does an adult need a giant
teddy bear or a small one for that matter! So she keeps on and finally asks me “Don’t
you think they are so cute?” Decision time, do I lie or say what I really think
about them? Well, Thank You red face and stuttering mouth, you gave me away. I
tried to politely; if that’s even possible, say that I think they are a little
creepy. Thank God she started laughing, apparently the joke was on me! She had overheard
me talking to coworker “B” the other day about these bears and thought it would
be funny to use against me! I mean have you seen the Vermont Bear Commercial,
it’s ridiculous. And PS Vermont Bears, no woman is going to throw out chocolate
like that!
I tell you that story, to say this; what is it about
Valentine’s Day that really makes you feel special? Now, before you get
offended by anything I am about to say, know this. I support love, I support
happiness, and all things that make you feel good about your relationship.
Dougo and I choose not to observe the “hallmark holiday” as
we call it. We have been together for 10 years now and will celebrate our 9th
anniversary this coming May. There was a time in my life when Valentine’s Day
meant something to me. A time when I wanted the candy, teddy bears and flowers,
then I met my husband. Don’t get me wrong, we have our bad days, but we have a
love to last a life time. Maybe it’s a product of getting older, maybe it’s
that I am not a “girlie” girl, or maybe it’s just that I am too practical, but
overpriced flowers and candy that are the expected social norm don’t scream
special to me. I just can’t buy into something that society says “if your man
doesn’t do this, this and this, he doesn’t love you enough”. I mean that is the
message right. And “we” buy in to it. How many times have you heard a woman
complain because she didn’t get the thing she wanted or the right flowers, jewelry,
etc.? How many times have “we” set the guy up for failure or just been
disappointed when maybe we aren’t with our loved one at some romantic
restaurant because work gets in the way? I am not a total Scrooge, I did buy
Aida Valentine’s for her school mates and as she gets older I will probably do
something for her like my mom did for us. I just feel that there is no material
possession that my husband could ever buy that would make me feel more love
than just hearing “I love you” any day of the year. Buying me flowers doesn’t
show me how much you love me, it just says that you watched a tv commercial.
The stuffed animals, what is that? I am an adult. I don’t need a stuffed
animal. Okay, you got me on the chocolate, I wouldn’t turn chocolate down if my
life depended on it (but you better make it Hershey’s)!!! Again, if this is the
day that makes you feel like you are on cloud nine with your love then I
support you, everyone should feel that love. For me, Valentine’s Day just makes
me feel like just another number, I would be just another person that got
flowers, no different from any of the rest. Of course we don’t buy each other
Christmas presents either, maybe I just have a thing against organized “give
your spouse a gift day”! J
In case you have never seen it, here is the "awesome" Vermont Bears Commercial
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